stanpavkovich

Chuck Swindoll in his book, “You and Your Child” shares how the Houston Police Department came up with “Twelve Rules for Raising Juvenile Delinquent Children.”

I want to share them with you.

1. Begin with infancy to give the child everything he wants. In this way he will grow up to believe the world owes him a living.

2. When he picks up bad words, laugh at him. This will make him think that it is cute.

3. Never give him any spiritual training. Wait until he is twenty-one and then let him “decide for himself.’

4. Avoid use of the word “wrong.” It may develop a guilt complex. This will condition him to believe later, when he is arrested for stealing a car, that society is against him and he is being persecuted.

5. Pick up everything he leaves lying around. Do everything for him so that he will be experienced in throwing all responsibility on others.

6. Let him read any printed matter he can get his hands on. Be careful, that the silverware and drinking glasses are sterilized, but let his mind feast on garbage.

7. Quarrel frequently in the presence of your children. In this way they won’t be shocked when the home is broken up later.

8. Give a child all the spending money he wants. Never let him earn his own.

9. Satisfy his every craving for food, drink and comfort. See that every sensual desire is gratified.

10. Take his side against neighbors, teachers and policemen. They are all prejudiced against your child.

11. When he gets into real trouble, apologize for yourself by saying, “I never could do anything with him.”

12. Prepare for a life of grief. You will likely have it.

This is a sober reminder of the importance of loving our kids enough to place boundaries and discipline in their lives.

The fact of the matter is, that no matter what age we are – we need boundaries and discipline in our life.

Be Blessed,
Stan

This weekend is Mother’s Day. It is a time set aside to honor and show appreciation to the person that brought us into the world, nurtured us and cared for us – our mothers.

So often whether you are a mother or not, we forget how our lives can impact not only people currently around us, but also can impact future generations. One such person is Naomi, a mother whose story is found in the Old Testament; a story that is often overlooked.

Her family had to move to a foreign country because of a terrible famine. And while they were there, her sons married. But in time, her husband and sons died and she decided it was time to return to her home in Bethlehem.

Here is the cool thing… she was so dedicated to God, that her daughter-in-law, Ruth decided she wanted that life for herself as well. Ruth was so impressed by the dedication of Naomi’s life to God, she told Naomi, “Your people shall be my people and your God shall be my God.” From that day forward Ruth turned her back on the old life she used to live and embraced a new life she found in God.

Because of Naomi’s influence, Ruth influenced her family, and Ruth’s love for God was so powerful that her great grandson became one of the most influential men of the Old Testament – David, King of Israel.

Ultimately, Ruth is one of the few women mentioned in the genealogy of Jesus Christ.
All this took place because one woman, Naomi… built her life around her dedication to God.

Often we’re simply focused on the influence that we have right here and right now on our children, grandchildren, etc. But the life of a man or woman who give themselves totally to God can have a ripple that will impact generations to come.

This past week I gave the challenge to our Church to rise up and be Jesus to a forgotten group of children in our community…. those who are lost in the foster care system. The results were amazing… I am so proud of our church – you can see the service on our website.

I shared a story I came across about Bennett’s Chapel Missionary Baptist Church a small African American Church…. in Possum Trot, Texas…. Who did nothing short of a miracle when they responded to the need in their community. Watch this clip and be inspired to do something great for God.

Be Blessed,
Stan

As parents and grandparents we need all the help we can get to help combat the negative influences of a materialistic culture…the following article gives you the tools to help you and your family celebrate Christmas in the proper spirit.

Read this and pass it on!

Gimme, Gimme!
by Dr. Bill Maier

On Christmas morning, after devouring Mom’s legendary homemade sticky buns, the Stevens family gathers around the Christmas tree. The three kids — Danny, 10, Molly, 8 and Christopher, 6 — excitedly begin opening their presents.
Their parents’ joy soon turns to dismay as they observe the children’s behavior. Like hungry sharks in a feeding frenzy, Danny, Molly and Christopher greedily rip open each gift only to toss it aside, searching for another package bearing their names.
Particularly troubling to Sharon and Rick Stevens is that none of the kids acknowledges the relatives who sent the gifts in the first place. They show zero interest in opening the cards attached to the gifts. After each child opens the final gift, all three continue to search for still more presents, making comments such as “Is that all I get?” or “How come Molly got more presents than I did?”
Greedy

Unfortunately, the Stevens’ experience is common. In a materialistic, consumer oriented culture, we face a real challenge in teaching thankfulness and contentment to children. They are conditioned to believe they are entitled to everything they want — now! Kids have also come to believe they should always get the biggest and best.
The Center for a New American Dream reports another disturbing trend known as the nag factor. Its recent surveys found that nearly 60 percent of kids nag their parents for a toy or a privilege even after being given a no. In fact, 10 percent of all 12- and 13-year-olds admit they will beg their parents more than 50 times for products they’ve seen on TV.

Grateful

Christian parents are called to cultivate character traits such as thankfulness, generosity and self-sacrifice. The Bible commands us, “Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:18). Jesus warns us, “Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions” (Luke 12:15). And Paul describes greedy people as idolaters who will not inherit the kingdom of God (Ephesians 5:5).
One of the most effective ways to combat the cultural mind-set is by modeling a grateful attitude. Verbally thank God on a regular basis, even for simple things like a roof over your head and food.
Also, do your best to model gratitude in your other relationships: friends, relatives and co-workers — and not only when they do something special for you. Let others know how much you appreciate them simply for who they are. Express that kind of unconditional gratitude to your spouse and children as well.

Generous

You can help your kids learn to be generous by serving others who are less fortunate. Christmastime is ideal for service projects. Your family might volunteer to serve Christmas dinner at a local rescue mission or visit residents at a nursing home, singing carols and delivering Christmas cookies.
The majority of children receive a boatload of new toys each year. They soon lose interest in most of these toys, which wind up collecting dust in a closet, basement or storage bin. One family I know has instituted a Christmas tradition in which each of their kids chooses several of his or her old toys to donate to a homeless shelter or a local charity. They deliver the toys as a family the week before Christmas, so their children can see where their toys are being donated and experience the joy of giving away their possessions.
Christmas also provides an excellent opportunity to start sponsoring a poor child in a developing country through an organization such as World Vision or Compassion International. Our family sponsors a little girl in Indonesia. When our children are old enough, we plan to take a short-term missions trip to Java to meet her.
Finally, while your kids are still on vacation, set aside an afternoon for them to write handmade thank-you notes to the friends and relatives who gave them gifts. Even young children can participate by decorating simple cards with crayons, stickers and rubber stamps. Make this a family project, as you help your children learn to develop the “language of gratitude” through words and pictures.

Be Blessed,
Stan

I ran across a very moving story that John Trent, the President of StrongFamilies.com and the Center for Strong Families shared in an article.

A true story that  illustrates in a very real way, the power of our words. The Bible says that the power of life and death are found in the tongue.

Mary had grown up knowing that she was different from the other kids, and she hated it. She was born with a cleft palate and had to bear the jokes and stares of cruel children who teased her non-stop about her misshaped lip, crooked nose, and garbled speech. With all the teasing, Mary grew up hating the fact that she was “different”. She was convinced that no one, outside her family, could ever love her … until she entered Mrs. Leonard’s class.

Mrs. Leonard had a warm smile, a round face, and shiny brown hair. While everyone in her class liked her, Mary came to love Mrs. Leonard. In the 1950′s, it was common for teachers to give their children an annual hearing test. However, in Mary’s case, in addition to her cleft palate, she was barely able to hear out of one ear. Determined not to let the other children have another “difference” to point out, she would cheat on the test each year. The “whisper test” was given by having a child walk to the classroom door, turn sideways, close one ear with a finger, and then repeat something, which the teacher whispered. Mary turned her bad ear towards her teacher and pretended to cover her good ear. She knew that teachers would often say things like, “The sky is blue,” or “What color are your shoes?” But not on that day. Surely, God put seven words in Mrs. Leonard’s mouth that changed Mary’s life forever. When the “Whisper test” came, Mary heard the words: “I wish you were my little girl.”

That was a God moment for Mary… It was the turning point in her life …to know she was loved and valued…  Those 7 words began to change her life.

God wants to change our life as well.

But many times because of sins we committed and poor choices we have made… often times we feel like we can’t have a relationship with God…

That God no longer loves us or He has given up on us. But nothing can be farther from the truth.

To those who are crippled by sin or enslaved to things you know are not pleasing to God…
He says, “I wish you were my son” or “I wish you were my daughter.”

Remember what the book of James tells us draw close to God and He will draw close to you.

Isaiah 43:4 “You are precious and honored in my sight, and because I love you… ”

Be Blessed,
Stan

The question that we are going to focus on this week is why is it important to attend church?

Some people say…I’m not interested in being a part of organized religion…I’m just into God ….What’s wrong with that?

Why is church so important?

First off the Bible says we need each other.

I Cor. 12:20-21 says, “Yes, there are many parts but only one body. The eye can never say to the hand, I don’t need you. The head can’t say to the feet, I don’t need you.”

I need you as much as you need me.

To say, “I don’t need the church”, well that’s pretty egotistic because what I’m saying is…
“I don’t need you. I can just do it on my own.”

And that is so far from the truth. God has wired us to need each other.
I Cor. 12:26 says, If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it.

The Bible also tells us that the Church is Jesus’ bride…

When we tell God… Hey… I like you…I like your son Jesus…but I don’t like your church that is like telling a husband that you like them but you are not fond of his wife….that is not going to go over very well…there might be a little tension in the air…a little disconnect.

Another reason to be involved in church, is because Jesus said, “The gates of hell would not prevail against the church.”

There is power in numbers….

We have an enemy of our souls that wants to cause us to crash and burn.

You know with the technology we have today ….
You could sit at home and listen or watch some of the greatest teaching around….

But that is not church that’s not being the body of Christ.

That person on T.V. or on the podcast doesn’t even know your name they aren’t going to visit you when you are in the hospital….
They are not there when you feel like giving up.

The church is about relationships.

When you lose somebody, when there’s an illness in your family, when you lose your job or whatever, Satan uses those opportunities to plant thoughts in your mind about God that are not true – that is when hell can prevail. That is when you need the church to come along side you and help you prevail over the situation.

Hebrews 10:24 says, “Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works and let us not neglect our meeting together as some people do but encourage one another, especially now that the day of His return is drawing near.”

The Church is the hope of the world…. committing yourself to the local church is the only way that you’ll grow into the image of Christ.

The next four weeks I will be on vacation and will not be blogging, but I will be back the week of June 15.

Be Blessed,
Stan

Given the current state of our economy, many of those in our church and our community have found themselves struggling. I’d like to share with you a few practical steps from Crown Financial Ministries that if taken, can help to lighten the load.

Career Crisis: If you’ve lost your job, don’t isolate yourself and make the mistake so many people often do. Make your employment need known to as many people as you can. Tell your church, friends, business associates, and family members that you are out of work and eager for a new career opportunity. Seek the help of recruiters, employment search firms, and online career placement help. It’s important to stay busy by making your job search your new job! Crossroads Career Network (Crossroadscareer.org) is a trusted source of help if you find yourself in a crisis.

Look for resources right in front of you. In an attempt to raise money, you may want to consider selling items you possess. Look around and take an inventory of what you have. Many people forget about assets they own that could be liquidated.

Budget – if you don’t have a workable spending plan – a budget – take the necessary time to get one. Don’t put it off another minute. It doesn’t have to be perfect, but you have to start somewhere. [Crown.org offers tools to get started developing a spending plan]

Sign up for the next financial workshop or seminar held in your community. Locally there is a Journey to True Financial Freedom seminar being held at Fellowship of Believers Church on April 4th in Sarasota. Pre-registration is required, you can contact them at 957-3333.

Obtain godly counsel. We have people here at the office who are available to help you through these difficult times, or you can go to Crown.org/Coaches to get advice on how to best approach your particular challenges.

So often the tendency during times of struggle is to isolate yourself and back away, in order to not be a “bother” or “burden” to others. This is why it’s so important to remember that as a church body we are called to carry each others burdens and lift each other up.

Be Blessed,

Stan

We all know that as a country, as individuals, and families we are going through some unchartered waters economically.
This past week I came across a great article written by John Piper, that I would like to share with you.
It gives some great insight and wisdom into the whys of what is going on and believe it or not some of the benefits that can come of it.
Here is some of what John writes…
God is sovereign over all things, he foresees them all, he causes or permits them all, and when he causes or permits something, he does so with purpose and design.
• The lot is cast into the lap, but its every decision is from the Lord. (Proverbs 16:33)
• Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand. (Proverbs 19:21)
• The Lord brings the counsel of the nations to nothing; he frustrates the plans of the peoples.” (Psalms 33:10)
• [The Lord] declares the end from the beginning . . . saying, “My counsel shall stand, and I will accomplish all my purpose.” (Isaiah 46:10)
So none of the recessionary events have surprised the Lord. His purposes and designs are being fulfilled according to plan. And what I want to do is draw your attention to some of those purposes.
(Some of) God’s Purposes in This Recession
1. To Expose Sin and Bring Repentance
And this works both individually and socially.
At the bottom of every Christian heart—no matter how advanced in faith and godliness—there is the sediment of self-reliance. Then God shakes our lives, sometimes to the foundations, to show us our self-reliance and clean it out with a new, deeper reliance on him.
Socially, the recession reveals a host of sins that hurt people. The recent Ponzi schemes are one of the clearest examples. Promise people huge returns on their investment when there is nothing to invest in, then pay those returns with some of the next investments in nothing. And keep doing it for years, while you skim millions for yourself. Until a recession makes people want their investments back—and they don’t exist. Recessions have a wonderful power to expose that kind of deceit. What will it expose about you?
2. To Awaken Us to World Poverty
Recession hurts us. It imprisons us. What is God’s aim? That we would wake up. Does this recession bother us? If it bothers us, we should be bothered by the fact that millions always live in recession. Only live in recession.
One billion people do not have safe water to drink. Sixteen thousand children die every day from hunger related illnesses. Almost eighteen million children are orphaned in sub-Saharan Africa. Drought and malnutrition make them vulnerable to diseases such as tuberculosis, malaria, conjunctivitis, and other water-borne illnesses.
3. To Relocate the Roots of Our Joy in His Grace, Rather Than in Our Goods
Here’s the clearest recessionary text about this in the Bible—2 Corinthians 8:1-2. It describes the roots of the joy of the Macedonian believers in their “recession.”
“We want you to know, brothers, about the grace of God that has been given among the churches of Macedonia, for in a severe test of affliction, their abundance of joy and their extreme poverty have overflowed in a wealth of generosity on their part.”
Verse 2 ends with a “wealth of generosity.” We want to be a generous people. Generous in every way. Where does it come from? From prosperity? No. Extreme poverty. “Their extreme poverty overflowed in a wealth of liberality.” This is why I call this a recessionary text. Here are people overflowing in generosity when the economic times are very bad.
Where then did the generosity come from if not from prosperity? From a supportive and sympathetic culture surrounding them? No. Verse 2 says they were in a “severe test of affliction.” That means they were being harassed. You can see what that looks like in Acts 17:5-9.
Where then did this wealth of generosity come form? Paul says it came from joy, abundance of joy. Verse 2: “Their abundance of joy and their extreme poverty have overflowed in a wealth of generosity.”
4. To Guard His Glory by Advancing His Saving Mission in the World Precisely When Human Resources Are Low
We see this all over the Bible. God does his great advancing work again and again when it looks least possible for us.
• He promises the heir when Abraham and Sarah are too old to have children.
• He splits the Red Sea when Israel is hopelessly trapped by Pharaoh’s army.
• He gives manna when there is no food in the wilderness.
• He stops the Jordan River when it’s time to take the land.
• When a city stands in the way, he makes the walls fall down.
• When the Midianites were as many as the sand of the sea, God whittled Gideon’s army down to 300 so God would get the glory for the victory.
• When Goliath defies the armies of the Lord, God sends a boy with a sling and five stones.
• When the Son of God is to come into the world, God calls a virgin to conceive.
• And when the mighty devil himself is to be defeated, a Lamb goes to the slaughter
5. To Bring His Church to Care for Her Hurting Members and Grow in Love
Buildings exist for people, not the other way around. May no effort to build ever keep us from caring for Christ’s followers. Acts 4:34 describes the early church: “There was not a needy person among them.” This is what the church does. Every member will have his needs met. God will test us to see if we are a church or a club.
To read this entire article “What is the Recession For?” or more from John Piper go to desiringGod.org
Be Blessed,
Pastor Stan

This week we are beginning a new series called “Christmas on the Silver Screen”.  In this series we will be using classic Christmas movies to illustrate some of the truths people face during the Christmas season.

This first week we’ll be tackling fear and loneliness.  For those of you fortunate enough to be surrounded by friends and family for Christmas, the thought of being “Home Alone” couldn’t be further from the truth.  But the reality is, that even in our day to day lives – when we take our guard down…and take our masks off, many of us do feel alone – even in the midst of a crowd.  This feeling is real, it’s deep and it hurts.  We need to know how to deal with it.

If you have friends or family that seem to have an especially hard time this time of year, invite them to come to church with you for this series. 

This weekend we are wrapping up our Fireproof Your Relationships series. Now is a great time for us to ask ourselves some thought provoking questions.   Asking these questions will help us take what we’ve been learning and turn it into action steps that can change the way we live our lives.  Some things to ask ourselves are:

What can I/am I doing differently to improve my relationships as a result of this series? Several couples have committed to working though the book “The Love Dare” with their spouse. One husband told me that as a result of reading this book  they are learning to be more thoughtful and sensitive towards each other.

What changes have taken place in your life or what viewpoint may have changed because of this series? I know for me, I was challenged by Tiffany’s message last weekend on how to be a better grandfather. She reminded me that when dealing with my grandkids I need to view life through their eyes not mine.

It is so easy to come to a weekend service and hear the message but not take the next step by applying what we heard to our life. Remember what the Bible says, we are to be doers of the word not just hearers. In other words, we are to take the truths we hear from the messages and what we read in the Bible and apply it to our lives.

Be Blessed,
Stan